A Little ♥ and Soul

...you can count on me. Ugh. I don't know where home is anymore. If home is where the heart is, then I am utterly lost. I feel lost. There's family stuff going on that I don't know how to handle. I suppose I have this ideal situation running through my head of how my family should be. How things should be without my mom here. That reality I cannot change. I cannot bring my mom back. As much as I want to, I can't. Anyway, this ideal situation that often plauges me when things in my family aren't going as smoothly as I want them to, is again plauging me. I want my family to be happy. I want my dad to come to terms that his ex wife isn't the best person for him. She never will be no matter how much counseling she goes though. There has been too many rifts, tears in the tapestry that is our family, that she has caused that there is no way that any of us, my siblings and I, could be happy with them reconciling. All in all, I want my dad back. In my head, this tapestr...

5 Placed I've Lived *Clovis, CA *Fresno, CA *East Rockaway, NY *Provo, UT *Whittier, CA 5 Snacks I love *cheese and crackers *grapes *Otter Pops *licorice *popcorn 5 Jobs I've Had *Nanny *Gas n' Go cashier *Maceys cashier *Book Baron sales clerk *Cell phone slinger If I had a million dollars I would...? ...Pay for my education. Pay off all my debt. Pay tithing. Buy a house and start a library. Save at least 10% in my .08% yielding savings account. Buy an iPod and lots and lots of music. Buy an environmentally friendly car. Buy a laptop so I can stop going to the library all the time just to check my email. Buy a piano. Buy a pina colada slurpee. Give away the rest to my favorite charity(ies). 5 things I love *My family *My bed *Pad Thai and peanut curry from Thai Kitchen *Sunny days *the smell of clean laundry

Can anyone make my hair look like hers ??? If you can, I'll love you forever and ever and ever....I really like her hair and I want it. I'm almost at the point of coveting. Man, I sound lame. Maybe I should stop... But really, if you feel like paying for a haircut and a body wave, I'll love you forever and ever and ever and....ok, I'll stop begging...but remember, all I want for Christmas is a haircut and a body wave. Okay and maybe an iPod from craigslist . Seriously though, I'd be happy with that for Christmas. Oh and some stocking stuff...and the greediness will stop....now. Is that enough Christmas gift hinting??

1. First Name 2. Last Name (Yeah...kinda hard to Google the last name Hanamaikai and come up with anything other than pictures of other Hanamaikais. This is my brother, Phil) 3. Bad Habit 4. What I did last weekend (...or this weekend) 5. Grandmother's name 6. Past Pet ( Her name was Sugar) 7. First Job 8. Dream Job (the description of the picture isn't too clear. He's a food and travel columnist.) 9. My age 10. Where I grew up 11. Past Love (except not this particular Mark. Although, he is very easy on the eyes...) 12. My best friend's nickname 13. Favorite place to be... 14. If I went back to school, I'd become... 14. My favorite place to visit 16. My favorite color 17. My favorite Food 18. My Hero Now, its your turn! The deal: Google (image) each of the following items, pick your favorite photo from the first two pages of results, and ta da! A brilliant blog post...

5 More Friends Why do I vote? Because I believe I can make a difference. It doesn't matter if you're Republican or Democrat or whatever, you can make a difference just by voting.

My nose is stuffy. I'm achey. My sinuses are generally unhappy. My throat is itchy and red and my ears are doing weird things. Ugh...I hate getting sick. I usually only get sick once a year, knock on wood. Funny thing is I was sick around the same time last year except my cold was far worse. I'm hoping that this cold doesn't turn into anything nasty. Like strep throat or an ear infection. I'd take an ear infection over strep throat any day, but I'd still have to go to the doctor and take antibiotics. Both of which I do not want to have to pay for. My head feels like its floating... Anyway, other than being sick, I have nothing to really update. Lani, Laura and I went FHE last week to carve pumpkins. They lasted nearly a whole week until the stupid neighbor kids smashed them. They had the gull to smash them while I was home! I hate trouble-making kids. They have a parole officer each and I'm pretty sure their lesbian mothers aren't setting an example for them...

So my friend Erin asked me to help her plan her wedding. I'm mostly going to be in charge of decorating the cultural hall for her Provo reception. So far I know that she wants a sunflower bouquet and centerpieces. I guess she mostly wants the sunflower yellow to be an accent with a winter-y blue as the main color. I have no clue what she really wants because lets face it, she doesn't really care about having the reception. She has the man, the ring and she's getting married in the temple. I was thinking about this whole planning business on Saturday while I lay in bed waiting for sleep to over-take me. Erin is getting married in the middle of January. Sunflowers, by nature, are a summer flower. Where am I to get real sunflowers for a bridal bouquet in the middle of January? I'm probably going to have a hard time finding fresh sunflowers but I figure I can take creative license with the fake sunflowers for the centerpieces. I just have to worry about getting a couple, me...